Halloween. I have always dreaded Halloween. For kids it is a time to dress up and get lots and lots yummy candy! It amazes me how much adults look forward to this holiday as a way to relive their youth. For me, I always hated this day. I absolutely hated having to pick a costume and dress up. My own loathing goes back to 1st grade when I was given a cute little "Casper" costume to wear to school. God how I got made fun of. It wasn't a scary costume; it was a "cute" costume. From that point forward, I hated having to dress up. The angst of having to decide on what to wear, then go about creating a costume; a costume that gave me the self assurance that I wouldn't get laughed at. Oh the pains of youth. For many years, I simply refused to get caught up in the whole Halloween scene. I simply didn't want to feel left out and therefore kind of self exiled myself from the day.

It wasn't until I came out that I began to learn just how much the gay world lives for this holiday. A day to dress up as something different, escape one's own life for a day I suppose. Even now I still don't fully understand it. It wasn't until 2002, when K and I received an invitation from our friend Tim to attend his "Hellywood" party that this would change. Ironically, it was being invited to such an exclusive event that turned my perception of this holiday around. Drudgingly, K talked me into going; we made ourselves costumes and had the time of our lives. Each year was a different theme. Old Hollywood horror films the first year, Under the Big Top the second year (complete with cirque de soleil performers) and the final year, Once Upon a Time.

Hellywood happened for three years. Tim took this year off from throwing one. Going from hating Halloween to looking forward to it was a big step for me. I really missed it this year. But all good things must come to and end.

So here is to all of you ghosts and goblins out there, wishing you the happiest of Halloweens this year!